Dear Professor Mendham

At the end of each College Writing II course I ask the students to write "Dear Professor Mendham" letters, where they imagine they are one of their future instructors writing to me about the students abilities and readiness for future courses. This last group exercise done in class asks the students to reflect on what they've learned over the course of the term, which I think is always an important step in consolidating and preserving the benefits of a learning experience. Additionally, students seem to to deep reserves of comic genius in the last 45 minutes of a course. Here are the two letters my Spring '08 students wrote:

Dear Professor Mendham,
The students in my history class that came from your College Writing II class far exceed the other students in their writing skills. They may not know their history, or what a pioneer is, or that Hitler was not the cause of World War I, however, their reports on the Emancipation Proclamation were better written than the document itself! In the future, could you possibly include a tad of history in your curriculum? Plus, their research skills make me look like a 5th grader.
Sincerely,
Professor Pearl H. Arbor

Dear Professor Mendham,
I have a few of your past College Writing II students enrolled in my Playa 101 course. I am concerned that with their exceptional knowledge of proper grammar they will have problems with hollaring back. When I talk to them about skilz I did not expect them to come back with punctuation. It is apparent that your College Writing II student will fail my class miserably, due to your teaching of proper format.
Regrets,
Professor Ben Dover
PS: Fahizzle my dizzle!